


No Place Like Home

by tryingherbestpacito



Series: Inhuman Dream dsmp [4]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: I'm Not Quite Sure How to Tag This, Inhuman Clay | Dream, Light Angst, Patches the cat is a good kitty, but mostly pain because that's all the streams are giving me, dream is alone, i am in spain but without the s, i just wanted to give Dream a proper house, just take my shit writing please, let him have his friends back damnnit, let the man have a house, some fluff I guess
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-06
Updated: 2021-01-06
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:00:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,652
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28586850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tryingherbestpacito/pseuds/tryingherbestpacito
Summary: Homeless man wasn't lying when he said he had a house.But a home on the other hand...
Series: Inhuman Dream dsmp [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2175888
Comments: 4
Kudos: 81





	No Place Like Home

**Author's Note:**

> GUESS WHO'S BACK ON THEIR FUCKIN BULLSHIT?!!
> 
> me fuckers that's who. In case you can't tell by now I am a Dream!SMP apologist and i wanted to give the poor homeless man a house. He's just a really cool character and i love messing around with his lore so take this bullshit i wrote after the streams
> 
> [future fic in the works to better explain my take on their universe?? maybe??]
> 
> (Slight spoilers for the 2nd festival btw)

Dream shuddered as the last of the portal magic rippled off of him. He leaned on the glowing obsidian pillar, pulling his hood lower over his scuffed mask as he put away his armor and let out a small sigh. Everything was set up, the final battle was tomorrow and he would finally get his land back like it used to be. He silently lept from lily pad to lily pad over the swamp, making his way through the trees as they grew thicker and more packed. A soft ‘mew’ caught his attention and he smiled softly

“Hey kitty” he laughed quietly, crouching down and letting the mottled cat scamper up on his arm “You miss me Patches? It’s been a while huh?” the cat simply chirped and nudged her head against his cheek before finally settling on his shoulders. “Don’t worry” Dream hummed as he continued walking “I remembered to bring you a treat this time” Patches flicked her tail and yawned.

Dream hummed softly to himself, fully relaxing when he found the vines he’d been searching for. He brushed the plants aside and pressed the hidden button, grinning as a rope ladder dropped from a much too leafy canopy above.

“Hang on kitty” he warned playfully as he began to scale up into the trees, pulling himself up onto the wooden platform hidden out of sight. Patches mewed and hopped off as he sat there pulling the ladder up to put back into the dispenser “You’re welcome for the ride by the way.” He huffed, scratching her behind an ear.

Dream brushed his pants off and smiled fondly at the sprawling building in front of him. High up in the trees, out of sight from anyone and far away from the city and any village was a mansion, complete with wooden balconies and platforms and too many rooms for one person. He silently treaded up to the front door, letting Patches in before slipping inside after.

“Gods its dusty” he coughed, waving away the cobwebs in the dim room “Might wanna scamper Patches” he warned, pulling out his sword and a torch “We got spiders again.”

After taking care of the spiders and cleaning up the place as much as he was willing, Dream headed back to the living room, inventory full of coal and sticks. He passed a small shrine in the hallway and paused, glaring at the dirty, clearly neglected tribute, flipping it off rudely.

“Fuck you.” He hissed at the small idol covered in dust and gunpowder “You know this isn’t what I wanted you prick-“ A window slammed open down the hall, startling him “Oh fuck off!” he yelled at the ceiling “Keep it up and I’ll clean the damn thing!!” the trees swayed the floor and he muttered quiet curses as he dug around his inventory before placing a few sticks of dynamite on the small platform “There. Happy?” The wind settled down and he huffed angrily, clutching a green sleeve as he tried to ignore the buzzing under his skin that had been growing the past few days.

“Why me?” he muttered, nails digging into the skin under the fabric “There must be plenty of others out there worth more entertainment…I know I do it on a regular basis, I can’t help it… It’s not my fault. I need it… Yes but why _my_ realm? Why _my_ people??... I had to, no one else would dare take them in-“ Dream inhaled sharply and shook his head, hands gripping his hoodie tightly “No. Leave them alone. I can do it myself-“ He ripped his mask off and bared unnaturally sharp teeth at the shrine, green eyes flashing a glowing red as magic swirled around him angrily “Stay away from her, the Blood god has her claimed leave her be. I’m good enough entertainment aren’t I?” he grinned unnaturally wide “What? My face wasn’t enough? Destroying my own land with war after war isn’t good enough anymore?” he let out a loud laugh, voice wheezing and crackling inhumanely “Face it, I’m the best damn thing you’ve got for a show!” he chuckled and composed himself, running a hand through light brown hair before slipping the mask back on

“Our deal has worked out well enough over the years” he hummed, adjusting the strap around his head and picking up Patches from where she waited at his feet, stoking her fur soothingly as her tail swished anxiously “You’ll get your show tomorrow, even The Blade will partake so it’s bound to be… _interesting_. You know how the Blood god’s vessel is.” He turned to head towards his living room when a bright flash made him pause. Dream flicked a glance over his shoulder at the shrine

Where the dynamite had been now lay a strength potion, several ender pearls and a Totem of Undying. Dream smirked, placing Patches on his shoulders to pick up the objects

“What? Don’t think I can handle myself?” he asked insolently, tilting his head almost mockingly at the items “I’m an Admin, I don’t need this. I have Creative Spells at my fingertips” he slipped them into his inventory anyway and turned away “I suppose I should show my gratitude. I’ll put on a good show tomorrow but for now” he let out a tired sigh “For now just let me rest.” Dream padded into the room, quietly setting up a fire in the fireplace as Patches made herself comfortable in a nearby chair. He headed over to another shrine in the room, this one smaller and neater although equally dusty. He gently cleaned off the dust, setting the idol carefully back in place before placing Ranboo’s book he’d stolen back from Tubbo in front.

“Thank you.” He mumbled, feeling a bit guilty about having thrown the Half-enderman child under the bus earlier that day but ultimately grateful for the information he’d gotten from the teen “The book as promised.” He dipped his head politely before heading for the kitchen, tripping over Patches weaving between his legs

“Stop that!” he laughed, hopping over the creature “I’m not gonna feed you if you keep this up!” Patches mewed back and flicked her tail as she hopped up on counter. Dream hummed quietly as he made himself a meal, tossing bits of food to Patches before heading back to his seat in front of the fire. She curled up in his lap and Dream laughed a little, popping in a disk into the jukebox to listen as he ate his meal.

Techno had been teasing Dream lately about not having a home, but the masked man only grinned smugly to himself, kicking his boots off and propping his feet up on the footrest. He was grateful for the fact he’d built himself a proper house years ago, hidden away from all the mess back in the city and _much_ bigger than Techno’s arctic home. The Community House had always been his proper home but that was gone now. He groaned softly and rubbed his face from under the mask. He’d have to fix that after they finished blowing the place up. He’d need a proper place to recover and the Nether trip back to this place would be too much for the weakened state he’d no doubt be in. Dream gnawed on a fingernail anxiously

“Do you think Techno would let me crash at his place?” he asked aloud. Patches mewed uninterestedly back “Yeah, probably not.” He winced “He’d probably call me homeless again, and I technically am.” He fiddled with a lock of hair “Punz might let me stay… but his house is way too close to ground zero they’d find me immediately.” He scooped up Patches and carried her to a different room, examining the wall of portraits desperately

“Sapnap maybe? Or George?” he shook his head and clung to Patches tighter “I…I can’t trust them. Not fully. Not yet again. Callahan? Do you think he’d let me?” he muttered quietly “No, no best not get him involved. Sam and Alyssa?” he kicked the bookshelf under the pictures frustratedly, Patches chirping irritatedly “Sorry sweetie.” He looked up at the pictures and paced “Eret doesn’t trust me, I don’t trust him. Bad and Ant are dealing with Skeppy so their whole group is out of commission. Maybe Puffy?? If I beg??” he shook his head adamantly “I’m not begging. I don’t _beg_. Not anymore.” He held Patches up to his face and tapped his mask against her forehead “Guess we’re on our own again” he cradled his pet closely and hummed to himself soothingly “Well, **_I_** am. You just kinda hang out over here by yourself dontcha’?” Patches chirped quietly and he laughed “Think I can make it out of the Realm all the way back home? I have enough for a Portal trip instead of Hub hopping there…” she flicked an ear “I figured.”

He headed back to the living room, passing the rooms for guests that would never come, walking down the empty house and curling back up on the sofa, his cat making herself comfortable once again

“Big day tomorrow Patches” he yawned, watching the flickering fire wearily as he ran his fingers through her fur “I think… I’ll just spawn spell myself here…” he nodded tiredly and yawned again “Yeah. I’ll put my stuff in a safe place and try to teleport myself back here before the pain hits” he took a deep breath and sighed, glancing out the window at the setting sun “They won’t find us” he mumbled, beginning to drift off “They won’t find us here.” He thought back on the destroyed Common House, his only safe place in the city. The only place he’d considered a proper home, gone. He bit his lip to keep the tears from falling as he laughed bitterly “Yeah, they won’t find me here…”

“I’m homeless after all.”

**Author's Note:**

> *claps hands*  
> LORE TIME  
> \- There are gods in this universe. As you can guess, Techno's patron is the blood god (no name given) Dream's "Patron" on the other hand is the god Algorithm (god of chaos, manipulation and trickery) That's who the first shrine is addressed to. They have a complicated "partnership", with Dream being one of Algorithm's favorite creatures to watch since Dream is practically chaos incarnate and Dream receives items in return for the entertainment. The second shrine is dedicated to Chat (goddess of premonition, decisions and messages). Its how he knows everything (Ranboo's book is long gone now. She takes secrets as payment)  
> \- Chat the goddess and chat the voices are two different things. Slightly related? possibly.  
> \- Dream needs chaos to survive. Literally.  
> \- Dream is highly protective of the people in his territory despite them being jerks, he likes his toys undamaged after all so he makes sure no one else catches Algorithm's attention so they don't self-destruct like he's doing. (Drista is currently under the Blood god's protection so she's safe... for now)  
> \- Patches kinda just hangs around the treehouse. She shows up whenever Dream visits and leaves when he leaves.  
> \- Dream really likes forests. They're easy to hide in and remind him of his childhood home which is why he built his house in one.  
> \- Who actually blew up the Community House? Don't know. But it hurt Dream emotionally either way (He still acts human after all)  
> \- As an Admin, Dream gets "injured" when his territory is "injured". His need for chaos (heightened by Algorithm's influence) usually overrides the pain enough that he can go ahead and wreak shit, but the pain will hit him just as hard once he calms down. Wilbur's explosions left him out of commission for a good few days after (and it was never "fixed" so it still dully hurts, so the Techno's future Wither attack is definitely gonna knock it out of him for a while.)  
> -Small mention of face getting taken (lost in a battle years ago). Yeah, remember in a different fic when i said the mask was a "prosthetic"? Thank you Algorithm. (like i said, he's very self destructive now under the influence)  
> \- Wall of portraits is actually a picture of everyone in the realm on their first day of entering. Dream has it so he can see how far everyone's come (he's quite proud of them actually. Most of his citizens don't have the best of backstories rip)


End file.
